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Prev: The Beginning of Understanding <<<
 Page 5 of 9 The following morning was a turning point in my way of regarding all that had happened , I will never forget it, because it was the first time that my very own hallucinations became something that could have an effect on the real world, and others around me. That morning I felt pretty bad, as if I had a hang over. As I drank my morning coffee at the table,with my six year old daughter and then two year -old son eating their yogurt, I didn't feel like talking. This is never the case with my daughter, who is always a real chatterbox. This morning I was glad to have her so talkative. I'd had a night full of dreams, little bits and pieces of them floated in my head, and I welcomed the distraction. I was seeing half-breed babies, thinking they were my own, my son clinging to me crying, my daughter playing with the children , I had to go with one of them, we had work to do; my son was zapped to sleep with a small rod, since he would not calm down. As I fought off these images, my daughter said, »I was with the nice white robots last night! » Still feeling a bit groggy, and assuming she'd dreamt about characters she'd seen on cartoons or something, I asked,
"Which white robots? " He went into a lengthy account of his 'dream', which he gave in french, so I will just give the simple translation. He has talked to us many times about these creatures and the things that transpired between him and they, never once has he changed his discriptions. In fact, denies violently when it is suggested that he is thinking of something else, or that perhaps any detail might be different from what he'd already described. At that time, he also got quite upset if anyone proposed that it might have been a dream, but more recently he has been describing these goings on in richer detail, with deeper insight,( which is normal because he is a year older) he now claims they are « faux reves », they seem like dreams, but, he says, they are not. He said 'snakes' flew in his room, through the wall, they took him outside to their « car that flies » and went up in the sky. His description of the 'snakes' always begins with the emphasis on the « big, scary, black eyes », he pulls the outer corners of his eyes up and out. This detail he returns to often.Besides that, he says, they have arms, legs, and great big heads. They are naked.They have a little mouth, no ears, but on the nose, he seems unsure.He mimicks one telling him to say "Bye, bye, mama!", but then tells of one touching him with his finger, « with red fire on it », and making him « ..faire dodo », ( go to sleep). I was shocked and terrified when he said all this! It was as if my own nightmare jumped out of my brain, and invaded the real world! I was careful not to show my feelings of panic, and asked no leading questions. I had no idea what to do with this. When my husband came into the kitchen later, I asked if he'd had dreams that night. He answered that,yes, he had. He had been furious at someone, wanted to kill them, but couldn't remember who it was. It seemed though, he said they'd been restraining him somehow.The only member of the family that had no strange dreams that night at all was my oldest son. I however, have faint memories of seeing him there, walking down a hall with several creatures, looking serious, but surprisingly at ease with them. Our dog, during the next few weeks, began to lose large patches of his fur, leaving bare skin covered with blisters. He began to get listless and weak, and had diarrhea. A trip to the vet was useless, she had no idea what was wrong. He eventually healed. I have read that these are the same symptoms as radiation poisoning. - That is , of course, only a possibility that I propose, I'm sure there are others. Next: Acceptance >>> |